Sex Advice for College Freshmen

 

Well, so this blog post won't be much use to you if you're looking for advice on how to "spice things up in the bedroom" (slide over to Cosmopolitan boo or check out simply long). This blog post is intended for girls who have tended to be more restrained about their sexuality and who plan to explore it further in college, or who at the very least want to be aware of appropriate methods to handle that element of themselves.

I want to give a little overview of my relationship with this topic before I start. Due to the social stigma that sex carries, it was never discussed while I was reared in a very conventional and strict Catholic environment. When I started becoming active in college without my complete consent, this turned out to be pretty harmful to me. I was unable to handle the circumstance, which has caused me harm that I am currently working to recover from.

I was extremely clueless about sex since I watched Indian sexporn and had no interest in it for my time in high school—I had my first kiss at the age of 18. Since there were no boys at my high school that I was drawn to or even interested in, it was simpler for me to keep my attention on school. As I started my first relationship, all of that changed.

My blog's purpose is to assist, and I feel it necessitates some level of openness on my part. My first relationship ended because of sexual abuse, which left holes in my heart that I sought to cover with more sex. I appreciate any woman's freedom to explore her sexuality in a way that enables her to be her most true self in this time of sexual liberation. But I believe it's crucial to consider the motivations behind our actions. I experimented with my sexuality while in a shattered and painful state, and it simply worsened my misery. We all owe it to ourselves to get the care we need and to stop perpetuating misery cycles.

"Your hurt is not your fault, but healing is your responsibility" is one of my favorite quotations. I've been clinging to a deep level of hurt that everyone around me could see for the longest time. My life's most significant relationships suffered as a result of that hurt. Hence, my first piece of advice for having sex in college is to make sure you have a healthy emotional and spiritual balance.

Being balanced makes it far simpler for you to end a sexual relationship with someone who isn't meeting your requirements, whatever they may be. Being in a balanced state also allows you to put yourself first and makes it simpler to leave sexually abusive partners.

Second, pick your partners carefully. It's more likely that full consent will be requested and your partner will want to secure your physical safety when you're having sex with someone you trust and respect. The sex scene in colleges is a unique creature. Consent, privacy, and health safety are all problematic. I would strongly advise against choosing men you just met at the club as your go-to companions if you plan to be active. Although it seems obvious, the college will undoubtedly teach you that when drinking, academic stress and simple horniness are present, 18 years of good home conditioning can easily slip your mind. 

Find someone or a place where you can talk about your sexual experiences without being judged or afraid, and that's it for my final college sex advice. If I had felt comfortable talking openly about my sexual abuse at home, I might have been able to escape my abusive relationship much sooner. If you grew up as I did, you undoubtedly have trouble finding people with whom you can freely discuss delicate subjects. I felt like I couldn't be upfront with many of the girls I was friends with at the time since I'm from Nigeria for fear of being judged. All you require is one confidant to whom you can turn for guidance and support. If you believe anything is odd about your sexual experiences, tell them right away. Because our minds can be so deceitful, it's risky to keep your thoughts to yourself, especially when emotions are involved.

My attacker would look me in the eye in a state of mental turmoil and tell me this was rape after forcing himself on me. I would be the one to console him and advise him not to say that because of my feelings and the "love," I had for him. Be different from me. Please inform someone if you feel that something is off.

Note: From a Christian perspective, I think celibacy and abstinence are lovely and wonderful methods to avoid many of the problems that premarital sex can occasionally bring. The sole purpose of this article is to support young ladies who may fall somewhere along the spectrum of sexual exploration. Your worries are legitimate, too. It is stigmatized in society. When I started becoming active in college without my complete consent, this turned out to be pretty harmful to me. I was unable to handle the circumstance, which has caused me harm that I am currently working to recover from.

I was extremely clueless about sex and had no interest in it for my time in high school—I had my first kiss at the age of 18. Since there were no boys at my high school that I was drawn to or even interested in, it was simpler for me to keep my attention on school. As I started my first relationship, all of that changed.

My blog's purpose is to assist, and I feel it necessitates some level of openness on my part. My first relationship ended because of sexual abuse, which left holes in my heart that I sought to cover with more sex. I appreciate any woman's freedom to explore her sexuality in a way that enables her to be her most true self in this time of sexual liberation. But I believe it's crucial to consider the motivations behind our actions. I experimented with my sexuality while in a shattered and painful state, and it simply worsened my misery. We all owe it to ourselves to get the care we need and to stop perpetuating misery cycles.

"Your hurt is not your fault, but healing is your responsibility" is one of my favorite quotations. I've been clinging to a deep level of hurt that everyone around me could see for the longest time. My life's most significant relationships suffered as a result of that hurt. Hence, my first piece of advice for having sex in college is to make sure you have a healthy emotional and spiritual balance.

Being balanced makes it far simpler for you to end a sexual relationship with someone who isn't meeting your requirements, whatever they may be. Being in a balanced state also allows you to put yourself first and makes it simpler to leave sexually abusive partners.

Second, pick your partners carefully. It's more likely that full consent will be requested and your partner will want to secure your physical safety when you're having sex with someone you trust and respect. The sex scene in colleges is a unique creature. Consent, privacy, and health safety are all problematic. I would strongly advise against choosing men you just met at the club as your go-to companions if you plan to be active. Although it seems obvious, the college will undoubtedly teach you that when drinking, academic stress and simple horniness are present, 18 years of good home conditioning can easily slip your mind. 

Find someone or a place where you can talk about your sexual experiences without being judged or afraid, and that's it for my final college sex advice. If I had felt comfortable talking openly about my sexual abuse at home, I might have been able to escape my abusive relationship much sooner. If you grew up as I did, you undoubtedly have trouble finding people with whom you can freely discuss delicate subjects. I felt like I couldn't be upfront with many of the girls I was friends with at the time since I'm from Nigeria for fear of being judged. All you require is one confidant to whom you can turn for guidance and support. If you believe anything is odd about your sexual experiences, tell them right away. Because our minds can be so deceitful, it's risky to keep your thoughts to yourself, especially when emotions are involved.

My attacker would look me in the eye in a state of mental turmoil and tell me this was rape after forcing himself on me. I would be the one to console him and advise him not to say that because of my feelings and the "love," I had for him. Be different from me. Please inform someone if you feel that something is off.

Note: From a Christian perspective, I think celibacy and abstinence are lovely and wonderful methods to avoid many of the problems that premarital sex can occasionally bring. The sole purpose of this article is to support young ladies who may fall somewhere along the spectrum of sexual exploration. Your worries are legitimate, too.